What If Our Kids Never Lost That "Little Kid Confidence"?

You know that magical confidence kids are born with?

They dance in the lounge room in their underwear. They roar like dinosaurs in the supermarket. They belly-laugh at fart jokes, ask the most inappropriate questions in public, and pick their wedgies without shame.

They don’t worry about how they sound. Or how they look. They just are.

Amy Schumer’s character Renee from the 2018 movie 'I Feel Pretty' said it best:

"when we're little girls, we have all the confidence in the world. We let our bellies hang out, and we just dance and play and pick our wedgies. And then these things happen that just make us question ourselves. Somebody says something mean to you on the playground and then we grow up. And you doubt yourself over and over again until you lose all that confidence; all that self esteem; all that faith you started with is gone.

But what if we didn't let those moments get to us? what if we were stronger than that? what if we didn't care about how we looked, or sounded? What if we never lost that little girl confidence? What if when someone tells us that we aren't good or thin or pretty enough, we have the strength and wisdom to say "what I am is better than all that, Because what I am is me. I am me. And I'm proud to be me"

I Feel Pretty - Movie clip

And I’d like to add: What if our boys never lost their confidence, either?

Because I’m raising boys, and I’ve seen how young they start to shrink. Not their bodies, their spirits.

It’s the moment they’re told to “toughen up” when they cry. Or the time they’re laughed at for dancing. Or when they get the message, spoken or not, that their sensitivity, silliness, or softness isn’t welcome.

The Research: When Confidence Starts to Dip

Studies show that around age 8, confidence in children, especially girls, can start to take a hit. A 2019 Confidence Code for Girls study revealed that between the ages 8 to 14, girls’ confidence levels drop by 30%.

While this stat is often quoted for girls, research also shows boys are quietly struggling, too; they just mask it differently.

For boys, social and emotional expression starts to shrink under the weight of gender norms around the same time. A landmark study from New York University found that by age 10, many boys start to believe that expressing emotions like sadness or fear makes them “weak” or “less masculine.” Their emotional vocabulary narrows, and their inner worlds become harder to access, not just for them, but for the people around them.

And so the light dims.

Not their physical energy, their emotional freedom. They begin to filter themselves. To worry about being “too much” or “not enough.” To lose the parts of themselves that once ran so wild and free.

As a mum, watching that light flicker out is heartbreaking, especially when I know exactly how it feels.

My Story: I Know That Feeling

As a child, I was teased about the size of my nose and my high-pitched voice—things I couldn’t change or hide. I started believing I wasn’t “pretty enough” and began shrinking myself to fit in, physically and emotionally.

I came from a loving home. But even in the most supportive environments, kids still absorb harmful messages from the outside world about who they should be. Without the right tools to understand emotions, neurodivergence, or body image, I internalised it all as my fault.

In high school, I never really had a boyfriend. It felt easier to hang out with the boys than sit with the girls, talking about their relationships. I felt left out. Jealous. My body never looked the way I thought it should, no matter how little I ate.

Cleo and Girlfriend magazine (I’m showing my age here) weren’t much better than today’s social media, constantly pushing images of sun-kissed, skinny, flawless girls, I thought I should look like. I just wish my older self could’ve whispered to my younger self: “It’s not real.”

That lack of self-worth followed me into adulthood. I settled for unhealthy relationships and clung to the smallest scraps of affection because I didn’t believe I deserved more.

Eventually, I grew into my body. The attention I once longed for came pouring in, but it didn’t heal anything. I lost too much weight. I lost myself in the wrong relationships, still trying to feel “enough.” It wasn’t until I met my now-husband that I finally experienced a healthy relationship built on mutual love, respect, and care. He's the most beautiful, selfless human I have ever met.

But even now, in my 40s—after three children and plenty of healing and love—I still have days where I’m hard on myself. Confidence wavers. Ageing and motherhood shift your identity in ways no one prepares you for. And perimenopause, with its delightful grab bag of hormonal acne, bloating, unexplained weight gain, and mood swings that hit like surprise weather warnings, doesn’t exactly make things easier.

Me aged 43, feeling fabulous and self concious all in the same breath

Even with a healthy lifestyle, nourishing food, daily movement, and breathwork that truly support me, I still find it hard some days to stay on track. To keep my mindset focused on what I know to be true: that I am who I am, and I don’t need to shrink, hide, or apologise for the skin I’m in.

And then I scroll. Kris Jenner looks more like a sister than a mother. Vera Wang is 76 and glowing like she just finished high school. And women my age, supposedly riding the same hormonal rollercoaster, look toned, dewy, and wrinkle-free in a way that makes me question if I missed a secret handbook somewhere.

And I catch myself shrinking again. Not because I don’t know better, but because I’m still unlearning years of thinking I wasn’t enough.

If it’s still hard for me, how hard must it be for our kids?

Especially the ones who are already feeling different. The ones who’ve been told they’re “too sensitive,” “too much,” “too loud,” “too quiet,” “not quite right.” The neurodivergent kids. The kids with bodies that move differently, feel differently, or don’t fit the mould. The ones who struggle to find their place in a world that often feels too fast, too noisy, too filtered.

Confidence Isn’t Something You Gain—It’s Something You Keep Safe

Those are the children The GET Co. was created for.

Because I know what it’s like to feel unseen. To feel like you have to change yourself to belong. And I want my own kids, and others like them, to grow up with something I didn’t have: tools to feel safe in their own bodies, to understand their emotions, and to build unshakable self-worth from the inside out.

Most importantly, I want them to grow up without making the same mistakes I made—mistakes rooted in low self-worth and a lack of self-love.

Because I wish something like this had existed for me as a young girl—something that could’ve helped me understand my emotions, my body, and my value before the world convinced me to question it.

At The GET Co., we’re not just teaching kids yoga or breathwork, we’re giving them tools I wish I had. Tools to build confidence. To regulate emotions. To move their bodies with joy. To stay connected to who they are before the world tells them who to be.

Because confidence doesn’t come from compliments. It comes from knowing yourself. Loving yourself and standing in your worth, even when no one’s clapping.

If we can help even one child hold onto that light they were born with, we’ve done something powerful.

And that’s what The GET Co. is all about.

We use evidence-informed yoga therapy practices to protect the confidence kids start with, and help them keep it. Our sessions blend movement, mindfulness, breathwork, and emotional tools to build inner strength from the inside out.

We help boys:

• Develop emotional vocabulary

• Feel strong and sensitive

• Learn to manage thoughts without shame

• Ground themselves through breath, movement, and stillness

  
  

And we help girls:

• Reconnect with self-worth

• Move their bodies for joy, not performance

• Build resilience through rest and emotional safety

  
  

Because when the world starts to tell them who they should be, we want them to still know who they are.

What If Your Child Never Lost Their Spark?

What if they could look in the mirror and say: “I am me. And I’m proud to be me.”

That’s the kind of confidence we’re growing, on the mat, in our classes, and in the hearts of every child we meet.

For the child who’s already starting to doubt.

For the parent who sees the sparkle fading.

We're here, and we’re so glad you are too.

With love (and belly laughs and dinosaur roars),

Renee x

Founder, The GET Co.